So i have this friend and she's really mean to her boyfriend and i used to like this kid (who don't i like right?) and she literally treats him like shit. it's really starting to piss me off. he deserves and can get wayy better than her. like i love her as a friend, don't get me wrong, but if she keeps treating him like this i'm literally going to scream. it's stupid that she can get a boyfriend and treat him like shit like she does and he doesn't leave or nothing happens really and i can't even get one date. what is wrong with me? seriously? what did i do that was sooo wrong that i can't even get one person (of the opposite sex) to like me? it's the pity party that never stops with me isn't it? i just want someone. someone to hold hands or just hold in general. everyone's like you'll find someone. will i? i don't know... i mean used to say i know i'll find someone. then time went on and i said i figure eventually something has to happen. now as time keeps passing i'm just like, okay... maybe not? i just want to quit because it hurts but it would hurt worse if i quit. all my friends are being cute with their boyfriends and all that stuff and i look away to be respectful to them but also so i don't have to feel like a fat ugly stupid pig who can't even find a date for one night. i just can't take it anymore. i'm so tired of being alone... even when i'm in a room filled with people, i'm just so alone. forever alone
Sincerely,
Scream Queen ☮
Sunday, August 26, 2012
Saturday, July 14, 2012
Dreams of Loneliness Like a Heartbeat
Another GREAT dream. okay so there's this guyy that i've liked for a while, and i'm really not sure why... he's kind of stupid, just a lil'! :)) anyways, back to the dream:
so it was fourth of july but for some reason it was REALLY cold. and we were at my old house but it wasn't the actual house just the street and the neighbors, well the really old couple that were my neighbors had (in the dream) dementia and were like lost or something so we had fun with that for a while then we were just laying on the top of a car i was under a cover and he was wearing a baseball cap and a hoodie. and we were laughing and just talking and stuff. then we stopped for a minute and i took his hat off REALLY quickly and he was like, "wh-" and i leaned in for a kiss and we head butted and our teeth hit and the only reason i didn't say that it was a bad dream was because that would happen in real life, well maybe not the rest of the stuff but the kiss. i just feel like if i EVER got the slightest chance with him that that's how our kiss would end up like that because i'm that big of a clutz. like lezbehonest.
Sincerely,
Scream Queen ☮
so it was fourth of july but for some reason it was REALLY cold. and we were at my old house but it wasn't the actual house just the street and the neighbors, well the really old couple that were my neighbors had (in the dream) dementia and were like lost or something so we had fun with that for a while then we were just laying on the top of a car i was under a cover and he was wearing a baseball cap and a hoodie. and we were laughing and just talking and stuff. then we stopped for a minute and i took his hat off REALLY quickly and he was like, "wh-" and i leaned in for a kiss and we head butted and our teeth hit and the only reason i didn't say that it was a bad dream was because that would happen in real life, well maybe not the rest of the stuff but the kiss. i just feel like if i EVER got the slightest chance with him that that's how our kiss would end up like that because i'm that big of a clutz. like lezbehonest.
Sincerely,
Scream Queen ☮
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
Sweet Dream or a Beautiful Nightmare
BEST DREAM EVER LAST NIGHT!! Okay so i'm in love with this band (Paradise Fears [PF]) and there are 6 band members: Sam (Lead Singer), Cole (Lead Guitarist, Backup Singer, My first love of the band), Jordan (Guitarist, Backup Singer, my second love), Markus (Bass Guitar), Michael (Pianist, my third love), and Lucas (Drummer). Well they do these "House Parties" and i've had one before (i'm currently laying in the spot Cole laid in) and it was amazing. Well in the dream, i had another one, and they were REALLY tired. so i offered to let them sleep in my room as long as we could to in there too. they said fine and we went to my room. but instead of one bed i had three beds in my room. One was my normal bed and it was in the middle. Lucas jumped on that one, Sam and Cole jumped in the one on the left and Markus jumped on the one on the right. Jordan was no where to be found at the time. I got in the bed with Lucas and i fell asleep also and when i woke up Jordan was in my bed and we were cuddling (and when i say cuddling i mean REALLY CUDDLING like wrapped in each other) Amanda and someone else was in the bed with Sam and Cole and April was in the bed with Markus and Lucas was on the bed Jordan and i were on but he was on the side closest to the bed with April and Markus. i woke up and Jordan woke up a few seconds later and we literally just stayed there for a long time and we talked and then every one was up and Jordan and i went into a room in the basement and i asked him if a lot of girls came on to him at the house parties, he said no, and i asked him if he would be apposed to me kissing him and he said no so we did... that. and went back into my "bedroom" and laid on the bed again wrapped in each other and then everyone just laid there and joked around and it was awesome. then my dad called and woke me up and to top it all off he was a dick. so no ending for me :((
but seriously, BEST DREAM EVER!!
Sincerely,
Scream Queen ☮
but seriously, BEST DREAM EVER!!
Sincerely,
Scream Queen ☮
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
I'll Never Get It Right, I Tried
when i worked at my last job, there was this guy there: he was tall and kind of awkward but really funny. he would always greet me with "hey beautiful" it was literally the best thing anyone ever said to me. i don't know why but lately i've been thinking about him lately, he left the job a few months before i did and i never got to say goodbye to him. i ran into his brother who also worked there a few days ago, i didn't have the balls to ask him about his brother, but i remembered their last name for some weird reason (it's a weird last name) and what school they went to and then i remembered that my friend went to their school so i searched the name and they both popped up pretty quickly. i added them both on facebook and i was pretty excited. even though the guy has a girlfriend but even on the job where he would ALWAYS flirt and talk to me he had a girlfriend, he seems to go through them quite often. i mean it has been a few months and his profile picture has a baby in it and i don't know if it's his but i'm still pretty excited to talk to him again. he's so nice and mature and even though we won't be "together" that's kind of something i'm looking for to have in my life right now, no matter how it's in my life. everyone tells me i need "an older man" and grownups tell me i'm beautiful and i have a doll face but no boy my age has ever called me beautiful, EVER. he did though...
Sincerely,
Scream Queen ☮
Sincerely,
Scream Queen ☮
Friday, March 23, 2012
Throw Some D's On That
1: Plains
2: President of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee
3: Active Member of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee
4: Speed Bump
5: Mouth Full
6: Throw Some D's On That
7: Hand Full
8: Set for Life
9: Big, Big Titties
10: Tig 'o' Bitties
15: Melons
20: Betty
use wisely!!
Sincerely,
Scream Queen ☮
2: President of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee
3: Active Member of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee
4: Speed Bump
5: Mouth Full
6: Throw Some D's On That
7: Hand Full
8: Set for Life
9: Big, Big Titties
10: Tig 'o' Bitties
15: Melons
20: Betty
use wisely!!
Sincerely,
Scream Queen ☮
Baby Got Back
1: no butt
2: bone
3: dat ass?
4: plump
5: junk in the trunk
6: ghetto booty
7: bubble butt
8: booty wurk
9: bootylicious
10: too much booty in the pants
15: Ms. New Booty
20: Baby Got Back
use wisely!!
Sincerely,
Scream Queen ☮
2: bone
3: dat ass?
4: plump
5: junk in the trunk
6: ghetto booty
7: bubble butt
8: booty wurk
9: bootylicious
10: too much booty in the pants
15: Ms. New Booty
20: Baby Got Back
use wisely!!
Sincerely,
Scream Queen ☮
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Love Like This
1- Da fuck?
2- not lookin' good son
3-if i was drunk
4- if i was tipsy
5-lookin' iight, lookin' iiight
6- lookin' iight son
7- lookin' good
8- lookin' good son
9- lookin' freakin' good son
10-lookin' GOOOOOOOOOOOOD SON!
15-lookin' FREAKIN' GOOOOOOD SON!!
20- Sex God
use wisely!!
Sincerely,
Scream Queen ☮
2- not lookin' good son
3-if i was drunk
4- if i was tipsy
5-lookin' iight, lookin' iiight
6- lookin' iight son
7- lookin' good
8- lookin' good son
9- lookin' freakin' good son
10-lookin' GOOOOOOOOOOOOD SON!
15-lookin' FREAKIN' GOOOOOOD SON!!
20- Sex God
use wisely!!
Sincerely,
Scream Queen ☮
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